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Being Famous for Looking Famous

So, I made my first appearance in the Yoshii “night scene” since becoming a pauper about a month ago.

It was bizarro, but very good times! What I keep thinking is, “only in Japan!”.

So, let’s see. I started out the night in my usual fashion. I went to Tony’s Cafe for a (totally low-calorie, I’m sure) super-sized taco salad. Man, it rocked. Go Jose! The local ALTs were there (all two of them), and my friend came over to hang out. I had been planning on going over to Loco for a minute (read “long time”), because I like talking to the master (Japanese term for the person who runs a bar…and the only person in this bar’s case), so after everyone said that there was no point in going because it was “dead”, I decided to just go by myself. No, this wasn’t actually a deviation in any way. I knew they wouldn’t want to go.

I didn’t leave Tony’s until after one in the AM, what with trying to figure out whether the place was even open or not. There had been a hardcore dearth of customers recently, so I was concerned that I’d find a closed bar. Well, I set off, and on the way saw other groups of young people going in the same direction. It was a small glimmer of hope for me. Another was when two guys went in right after me once I arrived at the place, “open” sign all lit up. Going upstairs to the bar, I found that there were actually about six people there! *Charity shock!* The two guys told the master that several more people would be coming. Two older guys were sitting over on two couches surrounding a table, and when they saw me situating myself at the bar, they were all, “It’s the teacher!!”. I just smiled amiably enough and asked for a drink menu.

A little note: After leaving Tony’s Cafe, all conversations, all everything, were carried out in Japanese. The only phrase in English they said to me was “Never give up!”, when I said “I give up!” when a pool game was dragging on into infinity.

Well, it seemed that one of the guys actually did know me. I went over and talked to them for a while about this and that. Apparently he had been at the PTA banquet I was required to attend (good times, though). He asked me what my name was again. He said, “Is it…ah…Angela?” He honestly didn’t realise that he was remembering a conversation at the banquet about…yes…how I looked like Angela Aki. I said, “My name’s Charity.” He suddenly looked super…happily embarrased? He was all, “yeahyeah! Sorry! I should have known that!!!” Then I said that he had been thinking of Angela Aki. He looked embarrased as he laughed about his screw-up. A young man came over and started doing the groveling bowing I rarely get to see to the man who knew me. It was the type that a person would do upon finding their superior hanging out in the same establishment where you had planned on being loud, happy and drunk with your friends, and thusly not tending to your boss’ every whim and fancy. I guess it’s an, “I’m really not worthy, even when I’m with my friends outside of work”. It was so ridiculous that I couldn’t help but think, “what a weenie!”. He would continue to leave his friends on occasion to kindof attend to his superior. Very interesting. The guys had me choose several drinks, and since I just knew that they would be paying for them, after the second or third that they practically required me to order (they were the last ones remaining from a nijikai *second location after the official enkai is over*, so I went with it), I feigned that I couldn’t decide what to get. I didn’t order anything else until I decided to play some pool (and thusly was totally on my tab). One of the guys played a game and a half with me, then had to take a phone call, so they ordered the young guy to finish the game (they had also made him order me one of my drinks as he was walking by our table, and of course he was only too happy to do whatever they said). I taught him all about US pool rules. Heck, I might have just been teaching him the rules in general. He kept trying to get the 8 ball in whenever he was playing solids, and this wasn’t 9-ball either. I had to keep saying, “This is the ending ball”. When the game was over (I think I won), he was all, “one more time!”. I, of course, was happy to oblige.

At this point, I had started hearing what a group of people were saying sitting near the pool tables. It was actually pretty blatant. They started talking excitedly about Angela Aki, and when I looked at them, they were all looking at me with crazy smiles on their faces. I’m pretty sure they knew I couldn’t possibly be her, but they still seemed excited by the doppleganger playing pool. As I took a shot, I heard a keitai taking a picture. I thought to myself, “No, they couldn’t possibly have just taken a picture of me. God, I wonder if they’re now sending it to a friend or something.” Not a minute passed when I heard the guy on the phone that must have just taken the picture. He was saying, “Dude, Angela Aki’s at the bar RIGHT NOW! You need to come here NOW!”. I know he knew I wasn’t her, but I also know that he was totally pulling a prank on his friend. I mean, seriously though! He even had a picture to back it up! I think they even eventually showed up, because I passed some guys on the stairway at one point who said a quick greeting to me in rusty English and seemed to have recognised me (I say this because you get used to the wide-eyed looks of people not expecting to find me right around a corner, and they never can get over it fast enough to say something in passing in English, but hey, welcome to the inaka).

Well, my pool guy was now on a roll with the “one more time!” deal every time the game would finish. I think it wasn’t hurting that some of the guys were paying us some attention. One was interested in the rules I was explaining. One was trying to give advise to improve my pool partner’s game (pool game, of course). One was really interested in being in my general proximity. At one point, he came up with his keitai and asked if he could have his picture taken with me. I was all, “uhh? Yeah, I…guess so!”. He was all, “someone take our picture!!!”, waving the keitai hurriedly, as if I would run off if it wasn’t done this instant. I was all, “you know I’m not Angela Aki, right?”. He was all, “yeah, I know!”. A guy comes up, and many pictures ensue. He had his keitai ready too, of course. The guy who originally wanted my picture was all, “You’re very gorgeous!” I was all, “umm… thanks!”. And then another “very pretty” from him as he looked absolutely thrilled that he could now tell everyone that he got his picture taken with Angela Aki. I think my pool partner was enjoying the “aren’t I cool?” factor from playing pool with me. Perhaps that’s why he kept doing it. Oh wait, no. Perhaps it was my witty and thought-provoking Japanese conversational skills. Perhaps not.
At one point, one of the bolder guys was talking to me and called me something. I didn’t understand, except that it was some sort of nickname. I repeated it. “boin chan?” He was all, “yeah, boin,” he cupped his hands as if he had boobs. “chan”, he finished. I just looked at him as my mind ran something through quality control. Here’s how it went: “Ok, he just called me ‘boin chan’, as in ‘boing chan’. Is it improper in Japanese society to smack around this guy who was actually able to say something so gutsy to a girl who is obviously taller and heavier than him? Ah, just do it, but maybe hold back the blows. I bet he’s delicate.” I raised my hand with the sudden “ok” from QC and just kindof bapped him with not much force at all on the side of his head, with a “grow up” look on my face. Then I felt like it was not enough, so I bapped him on the top of his head. And then another little rap on his head. Perfectly executed. He looked like he got caught, but still with a smile on his face. I went back to playing pool.

Not soon after, perhaps only a minute, and the master was moving quickly over to their table with paper towels. “I wonder why”, I thought to myself. I took my shot, then looked. Only to realise that they were for one of the guys (I think it was the one who said “boin chan”, and no, my retribution couldn’t have caused that). He was having a nose bleed. I saw it. His friends who were looking at him looked up at me. Then they looked all “crazy smiles”, and then started teasing him while laughing. I turned away really quickly with their implications. Do you guys know the whole idea here of how a guy will get a nose-bleed if he is sexually aroused from either an indecent thought or whatnot? Something around those lines, either way. You see it a lot in anime. Well, I think that was what his friends were teasing him about.

Eventually, people cleared out. All the young folk left. My pool partner’s ride left. The older men left. And he was still wanting to play pool with me. We were having a really good conversation going on there, too. It was pretty awesome. If only I could speak as well in Japanese when I wasn’t drinking. The master started practicing his guitar. He didn’t care that we were still there and said that he wasn’t tired anyways (there are no laws governing when a bar has to close, so it’s just up to the master of each establishment). He mentioned that the two guys did, indeed pay for several of my drinks. Good times.

The sun came up.

We said goodbye to the master, went to the 7-Eleven, stocked up on food, and started walking. Taxis weren’t running at that time (ok, so the only reliable one is closed from 4am until 7am. Why? That’s how inaka this place is). I got to hear about how he lived with his parents because he was the oldest. Japanese logic, but at least he gets a house in the process. He walked all the way to my house (his mistake, ’cause it was way farther than he thought it would be, even when he knew the restaurant near my house). He said goodbye to me with a, “let’s play pool again!”.

He was the only one not freaking out over my apparently uncanny resemblance to someone else. Yes, that totally gets you brownie points in my book. And I look forward to another bout of pool-playing…though perhaps not five hours straight next time. :)

ゲゲゲの鬼太郎

I just came back from watching a movie with some friends (at the lamentable full price of 1800円, or about 15 USD). Now, I couldn’t understand much of what was said, but it was pretty easy to follow, nonetheless. A little background on the story (it’s based off of a manga), and I was set. The movie is called ゲゲゲの鬼太郎, or Gegege no Kitarou.

It is based around a demon (named Gegege no Kitarou) who helps out humans. The eyeball demon (目玉->”medama”) sitting on his head in the poster is his father (seriously). The characters (minus the mundane humans) are all based off of traditional Japanese demons. I found it “really good times” to watch. The ending was a bit sad, but picked up just a teensy bit enough at the end to keep me from pining away for too long.

Some kids from the kindergarten were telling me that I looked like Gegege when I took off my glasses and put all my hair in front of my face. Talk about thinking of different things at different ages. Had I done that to my middle school students, they would have said I looked like Sadako from Ringu (I did actually do this, and they all freaked).

What I looked like to the middle-schoolers:

What I looked like to the kindergarteners:

And I am now a fan of ウェンツ (Wentz), the actor/singer (of WaT) who played Gegege no Kitarou. And since I am now a fan, I shall put up some pics of him. First, as regular him.

And then as Gegege no Kitarou.

Anyways, that’s what I wanted to say. I enjoyed the movie, and now have another person to say “ooh, he’s so dreamy!”.

I forgot to post this last night before I went out to part-ay. Whoops!

Golden Week…Blessed Golden Week!

Ten minutes until my Golden Week will officially begin (off work at 4:15).  Finally.  I will hop in my car and see how long it takes for me to get lost while trying to find Kristen’s house.  I suspect trouble will ensue either right off the bat, wherein I will give up and just take the speedy highway (but oh, so expensive!), or get lost in the very city she lives in.  Either way, I’m driving there.  One more little bit of victory over the roads (unless I pay the exorbant highway fees, then I’ll just be a sucker who can’t read a map).

My little bout of bar-hopping I expect to do tonight will be greatly appreciated after just being manhandled and molested by a new pack of five-year-olds at the kindergarten I teach at.  I really need to let that paranoid feeling that kids are going to attack me from all angles slip away.

I shouldn’t have bothered with my morning workout this morning.  I got one anyways, what with all the kids jumping on my back and having to drag kids who were latched onto my legs.  One little boy looked on the verge of tears when it was nearly time for me to go.  He promptly attached himself to my leg (reminds me of what I used to do, oh so long ago when I didn’t want someone to leave), and when I finally escaped his grasp, he stole one of my indoor slippers (a girl got the other).  So adorable.  Except for the part where they kept running past me and smacking me in the butt with them.

Man, I’m exhausted.

If This Was America, He Would Have Been Suspended

Days later, and I still can’t get over it.

Some kids were joking around.  That’s all.  But how?

One was brandishing his blade-extended box knife to another student, playfully swinging it back and forth as everyone laughed.  I just stared, open-mouthed, in horror.

Then I was all, “WHAT are you DOING???  Put that away!!”  He was all, “ah, ok.”  WTF yo!

That’s all I can say.

W

T

Freaking Gawwwwd!

Now That I’m Recovering From My Wasting Illness…

…time to start a diet!

Seriously, though.  After all the horrid, death-ness that was my illness, I’ve really lost some weight, and it isn’t soon in going back to normal.  I keep thinking my appetite has returned until I first realise that nothing sounds tasty, and then that two crackers is all my stomach will tolerate before going, “umm…”.

So, anyways, go ahead and take a look at the page I added on my site called ダイエット中, or “On a Diet”.  Or not.  Either way, it’s out in the open.  Nothing I can do about it now.  Well, so that’s a lie.  So much I could do.  I’ll just let my apathy keep me from doing anything cowardly.

Steal My Car!

After that last post, this one really wants to be short and to the point.

This happens all the time where I live (is it the same in the big cities?).  When I went to Lawson to buy some quick, stomach-friendly lunch, it was rainy and cold outside, so I turned on the heater.  When I got to Lawson, I simply left the car running as I went in to buy my food, so as to have a warm car when I returned.

I thought it was the most bizarro, trusting thing to do here when I first arrived.  Leaving your car unlocked…no, not just unlocked…but with the motor running saying, “please take me!”.  Anyways, this won’t be a common practice for me anytime soon, but today was still my first step into “not paranoid American”.  Still locking my house doors, though (to keep random people from popping their heads in rather than keeping out any thief…but that’s a Japanese thing).

The History of ‘Baito

Have I talked about my ‘Baito before? He’s a guy who works at the local Lawson here. Ever since (maybe the first or second month here) the first time I boldly gave him a shout-out at a Joyfull (24-hour restaurant) at 4:30 in the AM, we’ve been on interesting terms with each other. By “interesting”, I mean that he no longer talks to me in purely keigo (very formal Japanese that is the lament of many a studier of 日本語 that I know). Oh, right, and he always looks so happy to see me.

Oops! Sorry. For those who might not know the term, “baito” is a shortened term for “arubaito” which means (part-time work(er)). It’s a German loan word, if anyone could tell.
The whole shout-out at the Joyfull was a total mistake, actually, but one of those you don’t regret later. My mistake was assuming that I could judge that I knew people properly when I was rather intoxicated. I’m with my friends, look up and see him and his friends passing our table, and I’m all “Hey!!!”. And he’s all, “Ah!!!”. And it was beautiful…until he sat down at his own table and I realized to my horror that I didn’t know him as an acquaintance from a party or what-not, but as the worker from the closest combini (convenience store) from my house. I just recognized his face and assumed, is all. やれやれ！

Ever since then, though I was a bit mortified the first time, he would be all genki happy to see me, find some way to come up and say “hey”, and make some tiny comment on this or that. I think him being able to be so friendly with me gives him total cool points around his other worker peeps. That’s just my hypothesis, though. I don’t (seriously, though) think he harbors anything serious for someone who may or may not speak any of his local tongue.

And maybe I should have been more obvious with my wording.  He don’t like me that way.  I don’t like him that way.  This is just a sweet tale of platonic hey-there-now!  Geez.  Now, back to the story.

Oh yeah, ahhahhahhah! There was that one time at 4AM that I came in to the Lawson, drunk, and he was working. He was ringing up my onigiri purchases, and I suddenly realized that for the many months I knew him, I had no clue what his name was. Looking at his name tag (conveniently written in *argh* kanji) I was all, “naka nantoka….”, which means “naka something”. At least his first kanji was about the easiest one in the language to remember). He filled in the blanks for me, and I was super happy that I finally knew his name. Until the next day, when I had already forgotten. No prob. I just asked again. And now I know it! Woo! Go me! And yes, I had enough decency to look quite abashed the next time I saw him. At times I can be quite blunt with him (alcohol is evil!!!…unless you want to talk to random people at combinis). I think the only other time I ever said a full sentence to him was when I asked if he always worked weekends. He was all, “I work every day!” I was all, “OMG lollz!”.

I nearly cried *not reaallly, yo!* when I realized that he wasn’t working his usual graveyard shift anymore. What other reason did I have to buy onigiri at 3AM every Saturday? I was all, “Oh my god! He got a real job! Nooo!!!”. Then I became all super poor (the word in Japanese is “bimbo”…can anyone figure out why I would feel all weird saying -what my mind hears as- “I am a ‘bimbo’?”). I couldn’t go to my Lawson for about a month (two more days to go until I get payed!!!). One day I realized that *oh my goodness!* I needed food for lunch for a field trip we were all taking with the students. Since making my lunch is still a foreign concept *literally* to me, I had to run and buy a few things at the combini before school (the field trip bentos were all, like 1000 yen each *abt $8 US* so I was still saving money). There was ‘Baito! He was looking super genki to see me! I was looking all “sleepy Charity in trackpants”! He came up to me as I was choosing my delicious foods, and was all, “hisashiburi!! o-genki desu ka?” (long time no see! how are you?). I was still too tired to talk too much in Japanese, but I finished with the usual reply and smiled and all. You’d have thought I made his day with how he greeted me with the goofy grin he always likes to give me plastered on his face.

Today I have been in severe recovery from a horrid 24-hour bug that had me so bad yesterday, I even spent an hour at the doc’s getting a saline drip. I hope I’ll be back to normal to harrass students tomorrow, but we’ll see. Either way! I was at the grocery store, looking for things that wouldn’t upset my stomach (ate about 5 crackers in the span of 2 days before just now), and decided (for about the only time ever!) that I really needed a sugary drink. My body said, “You want to drink the cooolaaa!”, and, well, who can argue with that voice? I hmmed and hawwed about it for a moment, then decided that I would let myself spent the extra 50 cents it would cost to buy it at Lawson. Sure, he probably wasn’t working, but it was all in the name of research (when exactly does he work?). Oh my goodness! So, he wasn’t working, but he was still there! Weird. I think he knows what my car looks like *ok, so I think I might know what his does, too*, and he all leaned over to see that it was me. I did the same. We waved. The usual. I went in. Looked at stuff. Someone came up next to me. I assumed it was him, so I just looked right at him. It wasn’t him. Just another guy the same height and build. Who also wanted to buy yoghurt. Awkward. ‘Baito didn’t talk to me cause he was talking to friends. I went to my car, and when I looked up, he looked at me and smiled from inside Lawson. I smiled and waved back. So did he.

It’s all kindof weird, really. But I like the set-up.

Boy, though, if Yankii-Boy (a blog for another time, but you know who I’m talking about, Kristen) could read this, I’d bet he’d be all jealous! Hahhah! That’s funny.

I really hope that my assumptions on who can’t read English are true, too. Perhaps I should throw in even more slangy speech to up the incomprehensibility. And add bigger words. Like “incomprehensibility”.

Naughty ALT!

Alright.  Who out there in the entirety of Fukuoka prefecture is privately teaching students?

My supervisor came up to me today and asked if I knew of anyone teaching English privately.  I was like, “I know a whole three ALTs, and no.”  He mentioned several cities where the person could be (all at least an hour away by car).  I asked how CLAIR (who deals with us JETS) found out about it.  He said that an English Conversation school was saying that students were mentioning an ALT who had a company(is that even possible???), and they were losing business because of this person.  Wow.  One person is teaching so many people that an English Conversation school is worried about business??  Go ALT!

Not that I’m applauding this…, but seriously, either said English school needs to realize that it sucks that much to be hurt by one person when they’re located in a city full of conversation schools, or this is a totally fabricated story where I’m supposed to snitch on my fellow ALTs so that CLAIR can weed out the naughty ALTs.

I believe the skepticism was evident in my voice.

And honestly, people, I’m too apathetic to care.

What Keeps Me Going

Things are minutely getting better at work by the day.  Today was a total “woo hoo!” moment, though.  What could get me all stoked?

I just found out that I get a 30% discount on all office supplies from Kagashiya (stationary/office supply store), AANNDD I pay at a future date (they just give me an invoice), AANNDD they deliver it to me at work.  It’s like getting a present!  At work!!!  I luurrve this kind of stuff, and already have a few things marked down to order.  Boring things, I assure you (only thinking of the children!)…yeah…except for those magnets…and the illustration sketch book…  Anyways, 30% off yo!

Boring post.  Sorry :)

“I’m So Ashamed” and “Why Won’t I Eat That? It’s a Moral Issue”

Sorry, after typing all of this out, these two, totally different topics kindof emerged, but they’re totally linked by the enkai talk in the middle (money issues and bizarro food), so what could i do? Just a heads-up.

I broke down and bought vegetables, some bananas, instant ramen, chicken, bread, and milk (I know, doesn’t count since I gave myself leeway there). 1500円 (about 12 bucks US) I’ll never see again, but 1500円 well spent. After going to the bank to see if there was any money I could take out to pay bills (don’t worry, I haven’t paid them all yet, so there’s still hope of me skirting around at least one of them), I noticed that there was a bit more money in there than last time, which I promptly took out for said bills.

I wonder where the money came from. *checks bank book* Ah. From the Board of Education. Must be for my English Conversation class. I knew that would come in handy one of these days!

I first went to Geo and held, first, Ladyhawk in my hands for about five minutes until putting it back down, and then O-Kami (a PS2 game) for about five minutes before, also, putting it back down. I also stared with painful love in my eyes, much like one would towards an unrequited love, at the Kingdom Hearts II: Final Mix because there was no possible way I could even pretend that I could afford it while it was still at its new price (Geo dabbles mainly in the used game/dvd/cd business *as well as video rentals*, but always has new releases of products too). I’m glad I waited out those impulses to buy, though I know I’ll be back (had been looking for O-Kami, and NEED Kingdom Hearts II Final Mix).

There’s an enkai tomorrow for the new teachers in my second-year teachers’ group. Talk about pressure at work to get stupid drunk around your collegues. Nonono. Don’t even talk about how I just shouldn’t drink! The price is no different whether I drink Oolong tea (bev of choice when intentionally not drinking, say, at a bar or enkai), or shochu (not that I would…vile alcohol), so if I have to pay anyways, then by golly, I’ll show them how we do it where I’m from (btw, I’m a lightweight where I’m from, but can out-drink any of the teachers here). The best part about drinking socially in Japan is that it’s hard to call yourself a lush when only other people are pouring your drinks. It’s not proper manners to pour for yourself while with friends/co-workers. if you’re glass is feeling neglected, you just offer to pour for someone else, and they’ll always return the favor. Unfortunately, it frequently ends up with people pouring a thimbleful for you because there’s already beer in your glass, ’cause they’re really just thinking, “Hey, what about me, yo! I need to justify this enkai’s price, too!”.

A little heads-up. That last enkai we had cost about 5000円 (about $40 US), and though they give you a ton of food, it’s bizarro food. Ever since one enkai where I found out (before I tried it, thank gh~awd!) that one dish was horse insides, I’m constantly going, “What’s that? What’s that?”. I’m constantly in fear of eating whale, horse, or “hormone”…which I believe is kidneys. Only saw the whale meat at the grocery store so far, but still… Yuck. Yuck. Yuck! And that one raw shrimp that still had a clutch of eggs on it’s…thorax, was it? Yeah, talk about being reminded that it (and its hundreds of babies) died to adorn one of my bizarro enkai plates. No, of course I didn’t eat it. I didn’t scoop out the eggs and crack open the shell to eat the slimey, raw, pitiful, dead creature. That’s what I do when I have no more options, and the fire that I cook food over using an abalone shell, while on my little deserted island, has been permanently extinguished. That’s when I revert back to nature. Chewing away on that little mama shrimp. And the “hormone”.

But that’s just me.

Man, I’m such a hypocrite. Every day I get shivers when I pass the horse butcher and silently say goodbye to whatever poor hapless equine or two is being led off the truck. Every day. And yet, about once every month, I look and see, not horses, but cows! And I think, “why do I favor one animal, and yet not the other? My god, it’s being butchered just like the other animals, and yet I hold no moral qualms about eating it!” It will be a long time coming before I give up my omnivorous lifestyle, and that includes cows and the like, but instead of feeling sorry for the cows and chickens and such, I should just feel glad for the horses and whales, ’cause I just won’t go there. Why? As far as horses are concerned (I know this answer because people are always asking my why I won’t eat basashi *raw horse*), it’s because they are my friends, and you don’t eat your friends (I have to tell them that it’s the same as asking why they don’t eat their dogs). As for whales? Though I know that slaughtering methods for land-dwelling creatures still have a long ways to go before being totally “humane”, I just can’t imagine how you can humanely kill such a large creature. Did you know? Some places even eat dolphin (dolphin!!!) here. They don’t die all that humanely either. Watch this vid (good thoughtful discussion on it, too, in the comment section of this person’s blog) if you’re not squeamish (I pity the fool who thinks I’m joking), but keep in mind I only got through the very beginning before having to stop so as no not see anything that would make me too distressed. No, I didn’t make up my mind because of this video. I’ve known about it for awhile. I only just now searched for an article or something to direct you to. Lucky me to find it.

Anyways, I’m a hypocrite when it comes to cows versus horses, but seriously though! Don’t kill the whales! Haven’t you even seen Star Trek IV? Those whales are keeping peace with the aliens! I can proudly say that it won’t be because of me that the entire Enterprise gang will have to cause wacky hijinks in the 80′s to bring back those humpback whales to save our planet.

That I have yet to see (harhar) any transparent aluminum gives me faith that all hope is not yet lost.