teasmartgarden.com

Photos on Flickr

I’ve just uploaded a lot of photos to Flickr that would have never seen the light of blog (it’s difficult to blog about old events). So, please enjoy them. I’ve put comments for EVERY ONE of them, so in a way they’re like their own mini blogs. Yeah. Right. So I really haven’t been horribly slacking here. Sure.

So please check them out (and don’t let the ones on the main page fool you…some are actually nice!)!

Mom, you might like the slide show option in the upper right, though you won’t get to read the lovely comments I made for each one that way.

Trying To Do Something About Allll Of This

I’ve been MIA because of a slowly escalating nervous breakdown.  At least the biggest one I’ve had in memory.  The full-throttle crazy times were triggered at the planning meeting for the mid-year seminar (that I’m presenting at), and I ended up taking several days of precious, very scarce, paid leave to have neverending (so they felt at the time) panic attacks and sobby moments (though I did at least try to go back to school on Thursday…before once again leaving after only two hours there *only so many people I can weep in front of*).  Today I’m back at work, though I don’t know if the entire day will be too much for me.  Hope not.  I have things to do.

Which is part of why I’m in this mess right now.  So many things to do.  Things I can’t accomplish.  And everything “important to my job” is taking away from everything “important to me”.  And in my pursuit of trying to calm myself down from the next looming panic attack, I’m putting off everything, including my biggest stressors…english conversation class and mid-year seminar planning…the two things that’ll really kill me if they’re not done (english conversation classes are a constant source of incredible stress that ends only after the last class finishes on Wednesday, until about Friday when I start thinking about it again).

I hear that I’m covered for massages under my health insurance.  That sounds nice.

Coming back to my blog is a bit like “ooh, I haven’t done this in so long!!” and very “but am I really up to writing again?”.  I don’t know.  I have some things I want to blog about.  Took some pretty pictures.  But so far I have been in no proper mindset to be writing anything…  But I need to try again soon before I consider anything drastic…like doing a site overhaul.  Perhaps I should anyways.  Kinda sounds like fun.

Anyways, I’ve still got a crazy schedule ahead of me, and I still have to decide whether I’m staying here another year, transferring to Kurume, or leaving.  I have until February to decide whether I’m going to leave or not (conveniently a bit after my three week visit to The States), though the Kurume transfer thing gives me only until December 9th.

Oh, what to do…